3 THINGS YOUR CHILD WISHES YOU WOULDN’T SAY

Do you know what your child is actually hearing from you?

Consider the possibility that between all the I-love-you’s, your child may be receiving messages that undermine the love you try to show.

Stop and consider if you say any of these 3 things that damage your relationship with your child.

1. What you say when you’re upset

In the heat of the moment, our most negative judgments often rise to the surface. 

What you say to your child and about your child when you’re upset reveals a lot about what you believe about your child. And those words stick.

If you find yourself making judgments about your child when you’re upset, identify those negative beliefs and clear them from your life. If you don’t have negative feelings about your child, they won’t come out inadvertently.

2. What you say when they’re not around

Do you complain about your children when they’re not around? Do you complain about how difficult or time-consuming they are?

This can be an indication that you have not taken care of yourself the way you need to—and you’re taking it out on your children.

Resentment like this can damage a parent-child relationship and make your children feel like burdens, rather than gifts. Go take care of yourself and stop complaining.

3. What you repeat from your own childhood
Think back to that moment when a parent or teacher made you feel hurt or stupid. It was probably just something they said in passing, but it stuck with you all these years.

If you were silenced, belittled, or shamed as a child for who you were, you may inadvertently re-create that pattern in your child’s experience in surprising ways.

Choose to create a healthy pattern TODAY

It’s never too late to help your child heal

When you recognize your negative patterns or energies show up in your parenting, go to your child in a private conversation, acknowledge the pattern and work through whatever you need to.

Then give your child the voice you never had by teaching them words that empower them.

I asked my own children to use these words when they felt I had slipped into a negative or hurtful pattern: “Please change your tone” 

They did. And I am so grateful.

God bless you in creating a relationship where your child always feels safe with you.

Source : http://thechildwhisperer.com/3-things-child-say/#sthash.FlB4CrhG.dpuf


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